I successfully made a grilled cheese without burning my house down.
I’m proud of you.
No, yeah. Why wouldn’t I be? The question that really matters, however, is if you’re ready to handle the Pink Guy. Might’ve found some footage of him on YouTube.
It’s not my fault you guys treat it like it’s not a game of life and death. Seriously so boring when you don’t even lift a foot. You kids need to get on my level.
You know what? You’re washing me out, Beats. If a challenge is what you want then a challenge is what you’ll get. Let’s go to Universal. Heard during the spook fest, the actors can actually grab you. The one to survive the night without screaming wins.
Suck? Yeah, it does quite do that. You’re a doll. God bless people like you. Boys who actually care about a girl’s feelings and not just their vaginas are what makes this world go round.
Yeah, uh, well it’s not a big deal.
Well, shit. You caught me. Sometimes all this attention just gets to my head.
Or it’s going to your ass. Probably the only reason why anyone’s lookin’.
Are you fucking serious? You can’t uninvite me to a laser tag party, nope. I’ve been an honorary member of every one of your little ‘tag shindigs and that’s not going to change.
Yeah, well without you annihilating everyone in the first ten seconds, maybe the rest of us could have a chance to actually play. Instead of, oh the usual, waiting for you to find us and tag us out.
Dude, no, fuck you. I love his class.
Shut up, man. You only like him cause he complimented your pants the other day. Ya know Zartman was checkin’ out yo’ booty.
People were being insensitive. Not realizing that I’m a human being, not a fucking prostitute. Long story that you probably don’t care to hear. But, yeah, um, about that pink guy, I’d like to know when you think “some other time” is gonna happen. Like it’s not every day you see that in a mall elevator.
Really sorry to hear that. I can’t even begin to imagine how that would feel. Reckon it’d suck, though.
Look, when it comes down to it— it doesn’t matter what people say because one day you’ll find the best version of you that’ll make you happy. And when it comes, you won’t have to let people make you feel like shit, because who the fuck cares about what they think? Obviously you’ll be doing a whole lot better than them if they’re the ones criticizing your happiness, anyways. So, hang on in there.
Sorry, I’ll totally text you the deets next time, Adam. There’ll be more chances like these soon. You’re so dumb.
Someone just got uninvited to my laser tag shindig. A shame. It was gonna be legen…wait for it…. dary.
I spent all day shopping for new shoes instead of doing all this AP Government and Psychology homework and I gotta admit that I’m feeling pretty anxious about that.
Zartman isn’t gonna care if you don’t do your Pysch homework; won’t even remember to collect it, I bet. He’s like a fossil that needs to be put in the Smithsonian.
A pink leotard. Hm, I would pay to see that. You should put it up on YouTube. You would get so many hits. You could give him a silly name or something…like Pink Guy, man, I don’t even know. Mm, well, I just had what could be taken as the second worst night of my life, so yeah, I can’t top that.
Damn, should’ve. Ah, well, maybe some other time, I guess. Really? What happened?
I just now realized I forgot to take the ropes of my parents’ bed and I’m too lazy to do it. Does anyone want to do is for me?
I wasn’t invited to the latest family reunion? I’m kind of disappointed; it sounds like it was a blast.
I took no offense whatsoever. I don’t mind people to talk about me. Seriously, it’s just like, hey at least I’m not some loser who nobody even know the fucker’s name. But anyway, Adam, how are you?
I’m good, actually, just saw some dude in a pink leotard convulsing in the mall elevator. Bet you can’t top that, party princess.